What You Think Of Me Is None Of My Business

I have different dreams than yours and this is just normal. You can not judge me because my “ideal life” definition is different than yours. You can not judge me because I follow my own path. Just as I never judge any of the people around me for the way they are.

Sometimes we tend to forget that we all come from different backgrounds. We assume that all the parents in the world treat their kids the same way. We assume that all the cultures are more or less similar but it’s not and it will never be. The way I raise my child is never going to be the same as the way you do, I guarantee. I’m different and my child most probably is going to be way more different. We are all unique and that is exactly what makes the world a beautiful, colorful place. Please don’t try to change me, don’t try to change anyone around you. Remind yourself once again, why did you approach me in the first place?

I remember one of my high school friends. It was the exam week and we were in different classes but they put us in the same classroom for the exam, that day. She asked me how my English was and if I was confident for the exam. I just said “Yes.” Later on when we became friends, she told me that she really hated me at that moment and thought I did this just to ignore her. But then weeks later when we became friends, she was also telling me that she always admired the way I was. Because I have never faked. Even though she hated my response at that moment, which did not remain as the only case between us, she never tried to change me. I never tried to change her. We shared loads of good memories and when our time was over, we said ” Goodbye”. Without knowing when we would see each other again but appreciating every single moment we could touch each other’s life.

Please try to learn how to appreciate moments. When I say “moments” I literally mean “moments”. Recently, I had a lot of those moments where I’ve just breathed the pleasure the moment was putting into my life and seconds later I let it go. We have to learn how to let things go, as well. Some things are not there to stay but they just come to touch our hearts and make few changes. After they are done with what they are supposed to do, they become poisonous. If you insist to keep them instead of letting them go, they leave the poison and there is no cure. On the other hand, there are some things, some people, where we just cannot let them go. In that case, it is important to make some space for your feelings and create time to understand them. You have to be capable of judging your own life. List all the positive and negative they are putting into your life and make a decision. Don’t jump in the conclusion, don’t assume. Don’t listen to anyone. Listen to your own heart, own feelings. If you really want to keep them, you’ll always find a way. There would be no excuses. If you see that your heart and mind are giving you the “But…” excuses, leave it. Let it go.

I make decisions. Sometimes it takes me a second, sometimes weeks, sometimes years. This is normal. We are not living by ourselves and we are surrounded by so many different circumstances, different people. Of course, somehow they all affect our decisions. But let the effect be minimum. Because in the end you are the one who is going to be stuck with the decision for the rest of your life. If there is going to be a regret, it’s going to be “YOU” who’s going to suffer. It’s easy to say but hard to share the pain. Take full responsibility of the decisions you make and suffer by yourself instead of letting people decide for your life.

If I made a decision, I chose a new life, I chose a new destination, I take full responsibility. If my new path leads nowhere, I don’t care because it was MY choice to go on the right instead of the left. I can easily go back to the point I started and start all over again, no matter how far I’ve gone. I won’t get tired to try to get what I deserve in this life. Let it be love, success, career, whatever you name it. I can always fight and I always will. I am in charge and ” what you think of me is none of my business”!

“Don’t be satisfied with stories, how things have gone with others. Unfold your own myth.”  Jalaluddin Rumi



2 thoughts on “What You Think Of Me Is None Of My Business

  1. It shouldn’t be also forgotten that it is an inevitable fact that all the things you judge, one day unexpectedly will surround you. If you judge, you will be judge; if you try to change someone, someone will try to change you someday. As you have mentioned above, even though we are all different from one another and we are all unique, we come across in some ways somehow since we are all HUMAN BEINGS. People should remain to themselves that everyone of us has ‘feelings’. This is the main point that differentiates us from animals. However, most of the people are unaware of this idea and they lack the ability to have ’emphaty’ towards someone. They just pursue the easiest way, which is ‘judgement’.

    One of my friends had a job interview with a girl on the phone around 2 weeks ago. After turning off the phone, my friend checked the girl’s photo on Whatsapp. Her photo was kind of an attractive and striking photo, which was judged by my friend as she is kind of a religious person. The only thing that I could tell her “Do not judge her by her appearance since you cannot know what is hidden under that.” My friend tried hard to force herself not to judge her until the day that she will meet her, but it was obvious that deep inside she was doing so. However, she started to work, the days have passed and now she tells me that “You were right, I should not have judged her as she is the only one hat I can get on well and she is an honest, sincere and an outspoken person.” So, there it was…

    This is my life, that is your life. No one has the right to interfere with others’ lives and instead everyone is supposed to respect it ! One should have the capacity to ask herself/himself “Who am I to judge someone else’s life? While I am butting in someone’s life, what am I really doing in my own life? or What if someone would judge me because I didn’t do something in the way they didn’t expect?” First answer these questions and then think about judging others.

    As my dearest friend, Tuğçe, suggested, “what you think of me is none of my business!”

    Liked by 1 person

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